Rowan Michael is 3!

I started this six weeks ago! And didn't finish it, but the intent was there. I can't believe it's only been six weeks since his birthday! Rowan has changed so much in just a month and a half.

I feel like Rowan has always been a little older than he actually is. I've been telling people he's three for almost six months now and tomorrow he will be. He asked me to tell him a story tonight and I told him about the moment engrained in my heart of when they placed his sweet, soft little body on my chest. How he looked up at me without crying and saw me, saw my soul. He was so very aware even then of people and their feelings. 

Rowan is incredibly tender. His first instinct is to be kind. He'll share things with Lyra without prompting, give hugs to her, and ask me if I'm okay randomly throughout the day. Any meltdowns, freak-outs or belligerent behavior can generally be traced to understandable reasons (tired, hungry, socially overwhelmed).

He had a really hard start to 3. We FINALLY kicked the binky out the window. We had been talking about it and prepping him since January and it just never worked out timing wise to phase it out. He would ask for it non-stop the week leading up to it. We told him he could donate his binkies to the babies in the hospital. He has a cousin in the NICU and we had been talking a lot about Baby Kaio. Once the idea was born about giving the binkies to baby Kaio, he was on board. We took him to Game Stop and let him pick out a game. The price was the five binkies which would be donated by the cashier to the NICU. He was all smiles and super proud of himself afterward. That night though. Yeeessh. We were expecting it, but it didn't make it easy. One particularly inappropriate and slightly funny exclamation was that he would go and punch all the babies at the NICU until they gave him his binkies back. Probably one of the worst images I could ever in my life imagine. I know he doesn't understand that implication and was just fired up about being without his lifelong comfort object.

Bedtime now is pretty dreamy in my book if only a little on the long-side.  As Row could tell you with exactness and ease, "Bath, brush teeth, pjs, books, stories (2 made-up oral stories after reading books), prayers and then songs" I am NOT a good singer. I'm even worse with the perpetual cold I've had. The only thing that really gets him to fall asleep though is when I hold him and sing him hymns. I always dreamed of putting my kids to bed with lullabies, but when you have a voice more like William Hung than Celine Dion it doesn't really go your way. One of my favorite sounds in the morning is his little feet padding down the hall where he will go to the bathroom then come and find me. It just seems so grown-up of him to climb out of his bed, open his door and go potty without needing us for any of that.

 After phasing out the binky, moving his small self across the country (after a year of shuttling him from city to city and state to state), Row went a bit biserk. The poor little man. He needed such a large increase of love and attention while he adjusted and I wasn't giving enough of that to him. Luckily, he has settled back into his mostly normal three-year-old self. It makes me sad when people do see his rage and terror side without also seeing the sweet, pureness of him. The other day while doing dishes, Row came up and gave me a kiss on the back of the legs and said " I love you mommy! I'll keep you safe. Does that make you feel happy in your heart?" He also kissed me on the chest today and said "I will kiss your heart so it feels nice and you will know that I love you"

He really has come full circle from even three weeks ago. Sel had the bright idea to make a behavior chart for things like folding his arms for prayer over meals, not hitting, being good at church, etc. He gets a prize every five stickers though we do a bad job of keeping track exactly. I've noticed Row NEEDS at least an hour of focused, loving attention on just him to function at a happy level.

The imagination on this kid is unrivaled. WOW! I'm always blown away when he starts telling me stories and they are so detailed, original, and interesting. The other night he didn't want us to leave the room and said the monster with bees on his hand was behind his dresser. Sel moved the dresser out so he could see there wasn't. Once he left, Row turned to me and said, "The monster comes through the ground like a shadow and THEN the bees fly in my mouth. So he's not behind the dresser right now, but he will come after you leave." I remember being so scared of things like that as a kid and it hurts my heart a little to think his powerful imagination is causing him to distress. Luckily, Row's daily mission is to slay monsters and punch bad guys with his ssssttrong muscles. (He likes to say that while flexing).

He is still all sorts of athletic. I'm always surprised what he can do with that body of his. I am hoping we can get him into classes soon enough where he can run and jump and throw and swing. He picks up on anything sporty within 2-3 tries.

He doesn't have any rock solid friends yet in Nebraska. We do a lot with friends, but there hasn't been one he has bonded tightly to. He had his cousin-buddy live with us for a month and asks about playing with him a lot. I struggle doing things regularly enough with others since it is generally easier to not. It lessens meltdowns, fights, and buckets of tears. People are quick to tell me how I should parent and while I appreciate their concern, I do feel pretty solid on giving Row at least three days out of the week where he doesn't have to socialize. His top favorite places to visit right now are the zoo, children's museum, early education learning center, and art museum. Those all inevitably have kids there to interact with, but it's more of a choice for him to say hi or play with children there instead of having a designated playmate outing.

Row still eats really well and I'm so proud of him when he does. Sometimes I catch myself holding my breath when he's eating vegetables as if I might draw attention to the good thing he's doing and he'll stop. The kid likes veggies and it's not like me passing out at the table will change his preferences (hopefully). He is 77% for height and 70% for weight and even though he looks skin and bones, I have to remind myself he's obviously completely healthy and eats plenty.

I love Rowan so very much. I understand him and appreciate all the things that make him who he is. His laugh is the sound I think of when I need to smile myself. Three years with this guy has changed everything about me and I feel so blessed that he's all ours.

He misses Papa and Mimi so much. I just love how much they love one another. 

He looks SO happy here! This is him at our early education center. That place is AMAZING! Both Row and Lyra could go everyday, but we usually go once a week. They do story time, singing time, snack time and have an outside play area. It's run by early education teachers who go around interacting with the kids, planning activities geared toward learning, and generally being my favorite kind of people. 

I loooove this picture! Row was so excited to see Hannah get married. He kept talking about the temple and Hannah and princess. It was really sweet. 

The splash pad at the zoo is incredible. Rowan continues his three-year tradition of worshipping these things. His sister HATES them which makes her runs for the hills and his whooping laughter and splashing about an interesting balancing act. 

He still loves his weapons and practices with them once a day. 

For his birthday, we took him to his favorite place in Omaha, Pizza Ranch. They have pretty decent food, but the only reason Row really loves it is because of their perfectly sized arcade. His favorite one is Terminator and it's hilarious to see him standing on a chair holding this mammoth sized gun. 

On his birthday, he requested to go to the Children's Museum. The stars aligned and apparently it was national carousel day so he got to ride for free and as much as he wanted. He was in heaven. 

He's such a sweet big brother! He and Lyra have started to  play together more and more. I love how they make one another laugh. 

Rowan went through a rough patch up until a few weeks ago where he could not bear  for Sel to be gone. This is him clinging to Sel on his birthday at Chick-fil-a breakfast. He cried hysterically when he left for work which made the birthday less happy to start off with, but it ended with daddy and terminator and pizza.