The Eight Year Lie

I have a confession…I have totally lied to myself and a few other people for the past 8 years of my life. My family moved from Kansas to Michigan halfway through my freshman year of high school. I distinctly remember my first day in my honors English class for a couple of reasons. 1. Some of my best friends from high school ended up being in that class 2. I met some of the more unique people from my high school in that class 3. I told a lie that I ran with for the entirety of my high school career. Since I wasn’t there for the first part of the year, I had missed out on some of the assigned readings for the previous semester. One of the books assigned that I hadn’t read was Jane Eyre. I love to read and still have no idea why I decided to claim I had read the book…Oh wait, because I am an extremely awkward human being who has word vomit when I feel uncomfortable. Divergent example here to prove my point. One time when I was in the business building there was this guy advertising for some business majors event and he gave me a flier and he just kept holding this free piece of candy in his hand like he was going to give it to me, but then he apparently decided I had to earn that fun-sized twix bar by answering dumb questions. He asked me what my major was and then my brain short-circuited cause this is how our conversation went.

Me: "Oh, I am a business major. Gotta love coming to the Tanner everyday"

Guy with free candy " Oh yeah? What is your emphasis?"

Me: "Um, I don't have one."

Free Candy Man: "...But it is required for you to have an emphasis.."

Me: "Oh, well, I got it approved with my advisor to just be a business major"

Fun-sized candy bar holding man: "Who is your advisor?"

(I am starting to panic at this point because it is becoming all too apparent I am failing the jeopardy questions and that little piece choclatey goodness is just going to melt in his stupid, tiny man hands and not in my mouth)

Me: Um, well, ....(Cue my PERFECT friends Sars calling me). Oops, gotta take this! It's my grandma.

And then I plucked that twix out of his hand and scurried away from his perplexed face

Funny part is it wasn't my grandma...it was my roommate and she had been watching this whole mess go down a few feet away and was kind enough to save me. Too bad I didn't have a Sars that first day of Honors Freshman English...

Anyway, pretty much everyone in my English class hated Jane Eyre. Since I had “totally read it too” I hated it with the same passion as my peers. The recommendations on it had been negative so I never bothered with it. What in the world was I thinking?!?!!!? Wuthering Heights, written by Charlotte’s amazing sister, is one of my all time favorite novels!  Sel and I are regulars at the Provo Library and the other day while we were there I saw the BBC version of Jane Eyre and thought “You know what? I might as well watch it and really see how horrible it is.” Horrible? Again, what the fetch was I thinking? Yeah, it was as horrible as getting paid a million bucks to be a taste tester for  Ritter Sport. As horrible as getting a Swedish massage after running a marathon through the Alps. I am going to the library the second I get off work to check out the book because everyone knows the book is always better than the movie…which means Jane Eyre might have just landed on the top of my favorite novels list. How have I denied myself this wonder for the past EIGHT years?! A lesson well learned over here. For anyone that reads this, any other recommendations on amazing works I am probably missing out on? Also, anyone know if Ritter Sport needs taste testers?