22 Weeks

Sometimes I feel like I've become gradually less interesting of a person. It's not that I was overly fascinating before, but I think it's been a downward spiral since becoming a mom. I mostly operate on survival mode. Is my child breathing? Check. Did I fed him? A+. Does he have a mostly fresh diaper? Way to be. Is he clothed? Eh. Does sort of count? Is he happy/safe/stimulated? Kind of. 

I love it. I love it so much! But it also means if you don't think my kid is the best person in the universe, then I'm sort of a boring person to talk to. I've started to notice my brain completely flat-lines when I'm having a conversation with someone. I can't think of a single thing to say. I can't even think of a question to ask them which I am normally pretty stellar at. I just stare vacantly (probably with my mouth open) at whomever I am talking to until they feel uncomfortable enough to excuse themselves from my presence. I think I can blame "pregnancy brain" for at least part of my failure to communicate with other human beings. 

How is this all making an appearance on my post about pregnancy? It's sort of an apology to anyone who used to like to read my blog cause I had more to talk about than my child and my soon-to-be second. That's all I can mentally afford to be lately is "mom". I wouldn't have it any other way, but I know it doesn't always make for an interesting read. 

Soooo on to the current loading status of baby numero dos. 

1. Number of Weeks:  Just about 22 weeks. 

2. Due Date:  06.06.16

3. Gender : Still a little lady

4. Baby Size: A spaghetti squash. She was 13 oz at my most recent ultrasound two weeks ago. 

5. Weight Gain/Loss: Still below my pre-pregnancy weight by 2 lbs. Getting close to finally being back to what it was. I feel very lucky it's been a slow weight gain so far, but I haven't forgotten how gigantic I get near the end. I luckily didn't gain much overall weight with Row, but I still looked so big. I find it incredibly ironic that I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight the week after having Rowan and it took me 10 months of kicking my butt to lose the weight I gained breastfeeding. I'm a freak of nature who loses weight without trying during pregnancy and gains weight breastfeeding while exercising and eating well. The universe can play some really messed up jokes on you sometimes. My dream is to NOT gain weight during breastfeeding this time around. I'm not sure how to do it differently since I was running from 6 weeks postpartum and eating fairly well, but it's going to happen. Just wait.

6 Maternity Clothes: Bless you maternity clothes. Bless you. You know you've reached an all-time low of not caring about your appearance when you're not just wearing sweatpants everyday, but maternity sweatpants. My maternity jeans are irritating. Again with my ultra-weird body during pregnancy. I'm somehow down to the jean size I was while training for my marathon during college, but my belly obviously is toting a human. SO all my maternity pants fall straight off my butt, but if I wear a belt I feel like I'm crushing Lyra against all my internal organs. They also make me have to pee every five seconds instead of my usual ten second intervals. 

I've been majorly blessed with a mom who goes mad buying clothes. She had already stocked my closet during my Rowan pregnancy with tons of cute things and went ballistic during this Christmas. I have maternity clothes for months now. 

7. Energy/Sleep I now sleep with 800 pillows. Sel has been on an away rotation so it hasn't been a big deal, but I think he's going to want to suffocate me with one of those 800 pillows when he gets back. Ever since I had Rowan, I need to sleep on my back. My hips hurt too badly otherwise. Guess what? You can't sleep on your back when you're pregnant or your baby will die and you will have a heart-attack (according to my google search). My OB did say it was best to avoid back-sleeping so Dr. Google only exaggerated something that's real. I have to wrap my arms and legs around a body pillow and then I stack two big body pillows behind me so I can lay on my back when I fall asleep. It sounds comfy, but it's not. Row wakes up typically once a night which is perfect because it usually corresponds with when I need to get up to go pee. He's just helping his old-lady out. 

8. Symptoms: Crazy. Being crazy is a symptom of being me, but gets worse during pregnancy. I always find out about awful stories during pregnancy and spend my life thinking about all the things that could go wrong. It's awful. I hate it. Is there therapy for someone like me? Cause there should be. 

I've been achy lately in my hips and upper abs. I haven't been able to figure out if it's from one of my workouts this week or if I'm going into early labor (please see above symptom)

Fatigue. I've been feeling exhausted at the smallest thing lately. Rowan loves when I go down slides behind him at play lands. We were at Chick-fil-A this week and had the play land to ourselves. I could only go down the slide twice before needing a ten minute break. He was obviously disappointed in my lack of physical strength to go down 80 times in a row like a real mom should be able to. We also have been playing a game where we race from the sliding glass door to our couch. The distance is about 12 feet and I get so winded. Nannying has become tricky because I get so tired carrying two babies around. I don't know how moms with twins have more children. They have super powers for even having twins in the first place let alone adding more to their crew while caring for twins. 

9. Exercise: I am doing a health challenge for the next few weeks and have done a pretty bang up job here. I've mixed it up between Zumba, walking, swimming, biking, ellipticaling (can this be a verb), yoga and a pregnancy strength tape throughout the last three weeks. My achilles is being a butthead again though. This has been a recurrent thing since my half in May. It's a freaking jerk. 

10. Thoughts for this Week I am starting to connect more with this little girl! I keep having dreams that I give birth to another little boy. It's confusing me. Rowan lovesssss her. Adores her. Their connection makes me so excited to finally meet her and see them interact face-to-face. I was panicking a little bit about having a daughter earlier this week and Sel was wise enough to say, "Why don't we just give her a fair chance?" I've been setting myself up to worry about dealing with all the things I was growing up not even giving this girl a fighting chance to show how awesome she's really going to be. 

Just like I had a spiritual experience seeing Rowan has a young adult, I've felt/seen/whatever it is that happens to me with her. When I was thinking about whether we would have a boy next after her, I felt as if this beautiful young woman said "Mom! It's MY turn". I know it sounds kind of odd, but I'm obviously not great at explaining it. I just feel really blessed to have this sweet girl joining our family soon. I cannot wait for that tender newborn stage again where they just lay on you all day long and want nothing more than to be around you. 

I was really glad at the ultrasound that they verified it is for sure a female. A friend loaded me up with baby girl clothes and I had a moment before the ultrasound where I wondered "What if it is a boy? What do I do with all these adorable clothes that I really want to dress a chubby baby girl in?" She's luckily still a she! At my ultrasound, she was being quite the character. My placenta is posterior which means she can feel everything happening outside my belly really well. SO she's been deflecting kicks and punches from Rowan already. The ultrasound got some pictures of her beautifully healthy heart and organs and her gargantuan arms and legs. Rowan measured 5 days ahead of schedule with his limbs but she's about 8 days ahead for hers. The OB commented on it and assured me it was normal, she would just be a long little thing. Lyra was getting SO annoyed during the ultrasound. It's funny how you can tell how a baby is reacting to something when they can't exactly tell you and all you're looking at is black & white images. We couldn't get a shot of her brain or face because she burrowed into my back and pushed her butt against the probe. Anytime the tech would try a different side, she would defiantly stick her bum in that direction. No more pictures lady. STOP poking me. I could actually feel her bum protruding a bit through my belly because she was pushing back against the probe so hard. I was actually a little thrilled about this because it means we get another ultrasound at 24 weeks! The same thing happened with Rowan and we got the most beautiful picture of his face that week. He had a chance to chub out more in the womb from 20 to 24 weeks and the shot the tech got of his face was exactly what he looked like as a newborn. I'm so hoping this same thing happens again!

18 week bump

20 week bump

Yay! It's still a girl!

21 week bump ( I really like this outfit, okay?)

There she is! The ones at the ultrasound clinic were way better quality and you could see her so much better, but I'm certainly not complaining about another chance to see her. 

18 Months

Rowboat is a whole year and a half! He doesn't do anything halfway in his life though. This kid is just bursting with life and personality. 

What is Rowan like at 18-months?

We play basketball all day sometimes. I'm not even exaggerating here. 

7:00-7:20 Watch baby signing time sports episode where they teach you how to sign basketball, football, etc. 

7:30-8:15 Play basketball on our little hoop

8:15-8:30 Scream bloody murder because we are going to go eat breakfast instead of play basketball

9:00-10:15 Play basketball at the gym (after I finished working out) 

10:30-12:00 Play basketball at Mcdonalds

12:30-2:30 Dream of basketball while we nap

2:30-3:30 Play more basketball at home

3:30-4:30 Go grocery shopping, locate the balls in the store, and play basketball in the toy aisle. Refuse to let the ball go when we get back in the cart. 

5:00-6:30 - Dinner and other things?

6:30-7:00 Play basketball on our hoop

7:00-7:30 Play basketball in the bathtub 

BASKETBALL. 

He's pretty decent at it nowadays considering he puts in multiple hours a day practicing. I expect him to be master level by age 7. He'll probably be the youngest person ever to be drafted by the NBA. 

For such a healthy, energetic kid he is sick half of every month. It's the worst. I know it could be worse. He could have actual health problems, but I really am ready to just build a basketball court in our house so we never have to get exposed to all those germs that love Rowan. This last month he's thrown up for the first time in his life (I know how lucky to not have had to deal with this at all before now), a 24-hour fever/flu thing, and a never ending cold that has been successful in breaking Rowan's previous record for waking up at night. Let's hope there is a magical transition to health when you hit the year and a half mark...

Rowan can clearly say some words now. He says "hi, bye-bye, momma, dada, gun (thanks dad for having a locker full of nerf guns to teach his tiny self this one), cheese, no, uh-oh, wow, whoa, baaa (for ball) and our all-time favorite, chocolate". He is also fluent in some dilaect of Bulgarian. Rowan talks alllll the time. We have no clue what he is saying most of the time, but whatever is being said is perfectly constructed in sentences with proper punctuation. 

We are pro at tackling. In nursery yesterday, a kid took a toy Rowan was playing with and he tackled him so effectively and quickly the kid didn't even cry. I cringe at his aggressiveness while also being in awe at how well he can tackle. Football might just make it to number 2 on our list of favorite things. He is also a revenge seeker which we are trying to break. Last week he fell while going down the slide that belongs to the family I nanny for. He was mad so he came and pushed me. It was obviously my fault. I was sitting in the kitchen feeding the baby and very clearly pushed him...Oh brother. 

When we have to say sorry to another kid for pushing them or pulling Kylie's hair or taking their toy or doing some other typical toddler thing, Rowan will awkwardly lay his head on their shoulder. Instead of hugging with his arms he just uses his head. It's adorable. 

Row's favorite food is still chocolate. We've successfully eliminated it enough from his diet that he doesn't ask for it all the time like he used to. We go through phases of eating next to nothing to eating heartily and healthily. I've heard it's normal. Rowan will eat Chick-fil-A chicken tenders any day, anywhere, any time. We probably go way too much to that place. Rowan loves cuties and can pound three in one setting. It gives me a special sense of pride knowing he seems like he won't hate oranges the way I did growing up.

Music and dancing. This kid loves a good beat. It takes almost nothing to get him shakin his elbows. He'll just start dancing anywhere we here music. It's one of my favorite things about him. He only watches shows that have music. We've tried Daniel Tiger a few times, but he only makes it a few minutes because the music just isn't' there.

STAR WARS. My in-laws visited and bought Sel a belated birthday present of the entire collection of Star Wars plus my sister had bought Rowan a light saber for Christmas. Now we have a full-blown fanatic over here. He hums the Imperial March at least once a day. It's currently his theme song for life. I'm really happy we've fallen in love with this show instead of Teletubbies or Barney or some other show that makes me cringe. Oh, but we don't like Episodes 1-3. We only watch 4-6 because it has Darth Vadar. Can't say the kid lacks good taste.

Rowan does this little gasp when you ask him about something he likes. If you ask him whether he liked playing basketball in the pool with daddy this weekend his faces brightens and he lets out a big open-mouth gasp of excitement. It gets me every time.

Rowan is also so handsome! I'm his mom so I can brag, right? Row is like a miniature stud. (People say he looks just like his dad, so yeah- major stud alert people). He's always been cute, but his reigning characteristic is handsome. Something about him has always been so masculine even for a little baby or toddler. I again think Sel passed his inherit manliness to Rowan. Can we talk about how much they look alike again? I have yet to hear someone say, "Golly! No doubt who his mom is!". I know that could make some people sad, but as I explained it to someone the other day like this. The man I chose to marry, the man I thought was more attractive than any other man I've ever met, and the man I wanted to have babies with passed on his genes to our kid (soon to be kids). Am I disappointed Rowan looks like a replica of his dad? Heck freaking no. I want all of our kids to look like mini-Sels even the soon-to-be girl. I married Sel for more than his looks, but those were definitely a selling point sooo yeah, please compliment me by saying my kid looks exactly like the man I think is the handsomest in all the land.

On another note, I'm still nursing Rowan. Most people have been grossed out by this. I think it's weird they are, but everyone is different I suppose. I keep being on the fence about weaning. Somedays he''ll not nurse at all and I'll think "Hey! I guess that ship has sailed". Then he'll want to nurse seven times the next day. I do really want to wean him by the time Lyra makes her grand appearance because I see tandem nursing going very badly for us. I'm also super noncommittal so maybe he'll be that freaky kindergartner still nursing (jooooke guys. It's a joke). Some people have asked that incredulously when they find out. "Will he nurse until he's five?" Since 18 months is so incredibly old to be nursing? My MIL nursed all her kids until they were 2 and they all turned out just fine. Better than fine. They are all really successful, awesome, good-looking contributors to society who certainly don't have any "attachment issues" or "scarring memories".  This could be another post, but I'll not turn this one into a massive one about that. BUT the World Health Organization says this, " Review of evidence has shown that, on a population basis, exclusive breastfeeding for 6 months is the optimal way of feeding infants. Thereafter infants should receive complementary foods with continued breastfeeding up to 2 years of age or beyond. "

He doesn't completely understand he is getting a little sister, but I think he gets it a little. He loves to say hi to my belly and kiss it. He LOVES babies. Adores them. Can't think of anything else if they are in the room. He also has a new love for little girl clothes. It's so random, but he'll start throwing in little girl clothes to our cart whenever we go out. Only girl stuff. I've tested it out by handing him little boy clothes which he drops on the floor and beelines it for the pinks, yellows and purples. He knows more than I think he does. He's going to be an adorable big brother.

Row is just such a happy kid! He is so full of joy and light. He carries this special something about him. Whenever we are out, people will always pay him some sort of compliment if he smiles at them. I don't feel like I am bias in this. Is he cute? Oh yeah. Is he friendly and adorable? For sure. But I think the real thing that attracts people to Rowan is how he just exudes this pure excitement for living, for discovering, for being. I think that's what makes kids so special. They haven't lost that light and pure love. Rowan continues to be the sweetest little boy alive. He is so loving and tender. I can never put into words how much I love him. Happy Half Little Halfling!

Helping bake cookies

Rowan's favorite chore that I never ask him to do is clean the toilet. 

I must have said something pretty funny

My friend is letting us borrow her doppler and one of Row's favorite things is to listen to the baby in his tummy and the one in mine. 

One of the many days Row was sick in the past few months. He wanted to hold his baby doll all day. 

Watching Mother Goose Club and obviously loving it. 

Gah! Look at him! 

He really loved having Grandpa around.

Jedi in training 

Stealing my wallet to feed his basketball addiction at the arcade 

We didn't buy the 20 outfits he put in there, but he picked out some pretty cute stuff

He might have inherited Sel's looks, but he regrettably inherited my sweet tooth. He'll hate me for a lot of things one day and this is probably going to be on the list.