Nineteen

I used to play this computer game where you picked choices for a character that was starting at a new school. The character would go about her first day and would be presented with three options of how to react, who to talk to, what to say, who to sit with at lunch and so forth. The string of seemingly insignificant choices determined how the rest of her years at the school would be. The smallest difference of whether or not to eat lunch with a group of people spelled drug addict by the end of high school or valedictorian with a sports scholarship. I was probably about ten when I played the game, but the concept behind it has stayed with me over the years. The concept that simple, small choices paint the larger picture. One small choice can alter the overall picture forever.

This weekend during conference they announced young women in my church can now serve an 18 month mission at the age of 19 instead of 21. This changes the life course of a lot of people in a truly wonderful way. The week I first met Sel I was busy filling out papers to serve a mission. I had received one of the most powerful spiritual confirmations over that summer that serving a mission was exactly what I should be doing with my life. I was beyond thrilled and spent increased hours studying the Bible and Book of Mormon, volunteering at the MTC, attending the temple, and praying- a lot of praying. It was a beautiful transformation for my spiritual life. Then Sel came along and I became increasingly confused about what I should do. I fell in love with Sel quicker than I could have ever anticipated. After spending a lot of time on my knees asking for guidance, I received it and made the choice to marry Sel instead of serving a mission. Even though I felt peace with my choice, it was a hard decision. Making that choice though has blessed my life in so many beautiful ways. I have often told Sel how much I wish I had been able to serve a mission and have met him after- best of all worlds. When I pondered this new announcement though, I realized my life played out exactly as it was supposed to. I have been so astronomically blessed in all aspects of life. Had I been given the opportunity to go at 19, I wouldn’t have spent those two joy filled years with the world’s most perfect roommates. (pretend Cind is in this too :)

I doubt we would have become as close as we did had we only had Freshman year to bond us. I know, as I have said before, these girls were placed in my life for very specific reasons. They strengthened my commitment to the Gospel and blessed my life daily with their sweet, kind, quirky, fun personalities and they continue to do so now. I am a better person for knowing them. I might not have had the chance to TA or taken those certain classes that changed my perspective on life. And who knows the friends I would have missed out on meeting.

Like this amazing friend

Or this one (who Sel might not have ever met if these changes had happened a few years earlier)

I wouldn't have done my AMAZING Interniship with Watson for three straight summers and met that office full of sweet, brilliant people

 When it all comes down to it too, I might not have met the whole purpose of my life. Sel and I might not have met at a time when I was ready for him. Had I not received an answer to serve a mission, my spiritual growth would have been small in comparison to what it was. It is so humbling to look back at all the things that have been given to me in life that I certainly didn’t earn. The Lord has truly been guiding each step of my life with clarity, love, and an eternal perspective. My life is exactly what it was intended to be.

How exciting that there is such an increased demand for missionary work in the world! It will now be the norm for woman to have served a mission than a rarity. Those special opportunities that come from a mission that cannot be replicated in any other life experience will be an option for THOUSANDS who might not have gone otherwise. It will be interesting too to see the changes at the ole Alma Mater. Freshman year will be a whole new ball game for everyone. Awww! So excited for the ever bright future!