It Will All Work Out

I love being a mom. I love it to my very core. It gets better and better every day. It also seems to get harder and harder in some ways. I feel as if every stage of life truly has it's pros and cons. The one thing I spend a lot of my time doing is worrying about whether I am being the best mom I can. Not just a good mom, but the best mom for Rowan. I told Sel the other day I that I think Rowan would have been just as happy being raised by a different mom. He is by nature a cheerful, joyful little thing who loves deeply and wholly. I've often felt Sel has the personality to have been happily married to many a different type of girl whereas it honestly couldn't have been anyone other than Sel to make me the happiest I could be. I know babies come precisely to who they need to be with and Row's always been mine and always will be. I know every single mom probably spends time worrying about this (the not being the perfect mom part) and every mom in the history of time has spent time worrying about this. 

I find, however, my rational mind and emotions rarely hang out happily together. 

Rowan is incredible. He is constantly bubbling over with his love of life! His smile is pure magic. He is so tender and sensitive. He really, really feels things. We visited my nephew in Philly a few weeks ago and the perfect situation presented itself to illustrate who Rowan really is. He and Brian Jr. were collecting rocks and putting them on a picnic bench. At one point, Rowan slammed his head violently into the bench. He cried for one second only because I picked him up assuming he needed comfort, only to discover I was ruining his life by taking him away from those perfect toys. He had a bruise on his head for a week after our trip. Later that day, Brian Jr. barely pushed Rowan. I honestly don't even know if my nephew actually touched Rowan, but  Row was inconsolable for five minutes after because he felt rejected. He loves to love and be loved. He gets so excited when he is around other kids and just feeds off of their energy. He's like a little emotional vampire - he can't help but drink in the good and the bad emotions others are feeling. He is so incredibly sweet. He continues to give random kisses to me, giant hugs, and those radiant smiles. He also still tries to hug every toddler or baby that we encounter at the zoo, store, church or while walking down the street.

Hanging with his buddy at the library

Still really, really loves balls

What did I tell you about that smile? We continue to get comments about putting him in the Baby Gerber contest whenever he throws a stranger that smile of his.  

His first reaction to seeing his cuzzy

Talking with his best friend at the zoo

Row is also incredibly determined. I am sure it will serve him well as an adult, but it makes this adult a little bit exasperated. He's always been this way. I remember at two weeks old he absolutely would not be swaddled. He wasn't going to do it even though he couldn't control practically any part of his body, he was going to control whether we bundled him up. Lately, he's been throwing some impressive tantrums. He started his rage game early too. If he doesn't get what he wants, he gets maaaad. I used to like grocery shopping with him because he would happily play in those rad car carts and smile at other shoppers. Now it is a nightmare. Today, for example, as I was checking out Rowan rounded the corner with three snickers bars in his hand and the BIGGEST smile on his face.  He excitedly stands on his tip- toes to pass the candy bars to the cashier (cause he knows if he hands them to me, I will simply put them out of his reach and rush his little self out of the store). She laughs and hides two of them behind the counter. Realizing what we are up to, he makes a crazy dash for the door. I try to wrench the bar out of his hand while he screeches at the top of his lungs and then punctures the candy bar wrapper while I actually pick him up using the candy bar because he is gripping it so tightly. He lands on the floor in a pile of screams and tears. The cashier's face turned from amused to slightly horrified. 

Before this incident we were at the Applebutter festival. While standing in line, Rowan really wanted to get out of his stroller. He has figured out how to wriggle out of the harness just enough to cause himself bodily harm, but not enough to fully escape. As I was wrestling him back in, he looked right at my face and threw the straw from our apple cider slush at my face. Since I am trying a new approach of not reinforcing his throwing, I calmly picked up the straw without acknowledging it. Rowan decided then to throw the cup of frozen apple goodness at my face. The woman behind me had six-year-old triplets. She leaned over while I am dealing with this and said, "Whoa. I don't think I ever remember it being that hard with my three at this age'. So you're telling me someone who raised THREE toddlers at the SAME time thinks it wasn't as hard as raising one Rowan?! I still doubt her on this, but I think she was trying to encourage me. Comfort me? I don't even know. I do know that if we ever have triplets, I would probably cease to be sane for at least five years. Maybe ten. Okay, give me the full twenty. 

Me contemplating Sel's cute derrière

Rowan is also giving me a run for my money with eating. All he wants is junk, because DUH don't we all. He also is too, too smart for his own good. He knows how to sign/sort of say chocolate and cheese and chips. He will eat green smoothies almost every morning  and sometimes other random veggies or fruit. He still asks for junk all the time though even when we don't have it in the house. Remember when the kid couldn't remember that their was a toy behind my back and now he remembers ONE time he shared a free cookie sample at Kroger and now will point to the bakery counter every time we are there?

I think the thing I struggle with a lot with him is how my personality is not overly similar to his. I am a very passive person. I am content to change my course of action should the situation warrant it. I think I've always been that way. I am just happy to be happy no matter what is going on around me. I might whine a little (a lot) if things aren't going my way, but I will ultimately go with the flow. I'm a people pleaser. It's been great for me in some ways and not in others. Parenting Rowan is requiring me to be more forceful and resolute than I am used to. I know as his mom I am the boss. I get to pick what he does and doesn't do, but that very often results in epic tantrums because it is not what Rowan wants. I know this isn't unique to parentings toddlers. I'm working on being bossmom and will hopefully be there soon for Rowan's developmental sake. 

I do sometimes stare around at church (for the ten minutes we are in there for) at all the kids close to his age just pleasantly staying in their pews. Do they have their moments? Sure. I just feel like there hasn't been a Sunday yet where I am not part of the "parent club" in the hallway.  I am also fearful of judgement from other seasoned parents who obviously have their crap together. I have never felt that way from friends, but when we are out and about I can feel the judgements searing into the back of my head while Rowan leans out the side of the cart ripping off sale signs or causing internal damage while he strains against his belt while simultaneously chucking cans out of the cart. Most people are understanding and kind, but the few that aren't regrettably stay with me. When I am having a good day, I mentally wave them away with a good pity stare and a laugh. The other days where my more passive, people-leasing part comes through leave me feeling a bit hopeless. Questioning where I went wrong and am going wrong in teaching Row to be at least a little less wild. 

Parenting books are great. Sage advice from other parents are great. At the end of the day though, no one knows precisely how to perfectly parent Rowan (including me). 

I listened to General Conference today (www.lds.org) and had been praying for some answers as to whether I am raising this precious child the way Heavenly Father would want me to.  They all spoke to my heart in different ways about it, but Neill F. Marriott said something that stuck with me. Did you know she is the mother of ELEVEN children? 11. She has gone through the toddler stage eleven times and she's alive. She's radiant even. She has a saying in her family "It will all work out". I believe it. I know it. I know it will all work out no matter what lies ahead. I know that tomorrow I will read this blog and say, "I don't even really feel that way right now! I'm an awesome mom. Why did I write that?" But that's the honesty happening right now. 

I also know that  "if our lives are centered in Jesus Christ he can successfully mold us into who we need to be." _ Ricahrd J. Maynes. I can do this. I love doing it. I know that if I make a daily effort to center my life around Christ, I can be the best mother for Row. I also know someday 16-year-old Rowan will be slamming a door in my face while proclaiming I am the meanest mom alive and I will pine for the days his tiny self would throw silly little tantrums at the store. 

A very mild Rowan tantrum at Meier

Notice the dirt on his face from when he biffed it hard onto the ground. Poor little blondie. Obviously he found a reason to keep smiling despite his hard day. He's the best kind of teacher. 

Summer of a one-year-old

I felt I was due for a more fun, creative post. I kept promising myself I would get around to it, but then I also promised myself I would watch the rest of Dr. Who on Netflix. So instead I decided on a casual update to keep my memories straight as I continue to suffer from "mom brain" which sort of feels like a less serious version of Alzheimer's for me. 

We went to UTAH! It was incredible. It was also crazy and stressful and I have sworn to myself I am never traveling again. I am about to eat those words as we are embarking on a 8 hour road trip to Allentown, PA next week. That dang mom brain making me forget how terribly Rowan does in confined spaces for longer than two seconds. 

We started our trip to Utah by missing our flight. Fail. We got incredibly lucky and landed a flight two hours later. Rowan was exhausted to start with as we woke his poor self up at 5am to get there on time (aka not even close to on time because we missed our flight). Luckily I sat next to incredibly sweet people on ever flight who were helpful and understanding of how crazed out Row was. It helps that he is so charming. He made sure to go down the aisle and stop at pretty much every seat to beam up at the fellow passengers. Easy to dislike the frazzled mom, hard to hate on the toddler toting his award-winning grin. 

That smile though! He might be part-merman with how ardently he loves water

The trip really was amazing. It was so wonderful to see so many friends and family. I already have classified the trip as one of those perfect summer memories that keep you warm and hopeful in the dead of winter. The theme for Rowan other than fun-in-the-sun was sleep deprivation. He struggled. We went to a beautiful wedding for a cousin up the canyon and I got this close to throwing myself off the beautiful pine-studded mountain they were married on. It didn't help that I had convinced my in-laws wearing three inch heels was going to be just dandy for Row and I. I even ran around the dressing room to prove my point. I'm an idiot. I NEVER wear heels. Ever. Why did I think a wedding on a mountain with a sleep deprived toddler in three inch heels was a good idea? Thank goodness for understanding, helpful relatives. 

His face looks like, "Grandma is trying to get me to drink champagne?!" It's sparkling cider  and Rowan tried to drink everyone's at the table

Fav Uncle Bern made the million mile journey to be there for a very short time. Row loved being on his shoulders

The outfit was expertly put together by Jess and Deidre. I felt like I was on a TLC Makeover Show. It was wonderful to have helpers to coordinate accessories with-something I practically never wear. The heels though, those were all my foolish doing. 

This was what started the first tantrum of the wedding. It was honestly five minutes after we got there. Rowan wanted to get in the waterfall. I told him no. He fell on the stone floor arching his back and crying. He has leveled up to expert archer this month. When he wants to get down he will go limp and straighten his arms above his head. As he starts to slip from your fingers, he will arch quickly and drop to the floor running. 

The whole reason for the trip was to see my new little niece! We were supposed to see her in Texas, but Rowan came down with HFM at the same time. Can I say something real quick about the newest little princess? She seems like such a sweetheart! While admiring my sis-in-law expertly mother her the whole trip, I remembered back to when Row was the same age. He was a great baby, but he's never been calm. He's always been high energy. I remember making a trip with Row to Utah around the same time as Stella and Jess made their most recent trek. Rowan was right in the middle of arching away whenever I would try to nurse him and I remember being in a perpetual fog of "keep the baby alive". Jess just seemed to have her mothering together. Makes sense that someone who is so adaptable had a baby who takes after her. 

Miss Awesome and Rowboat

LIttle princess. 

The beautiful mom who made a beautiful baby

Ugh. I'm already wanting to go to bed. So, let's see the rest of the trip was fab and the plane ride home was not great, but also not a complete nightmare. We've been spending the last few weeks over at our new friends' house. I've started to nanny some cuties a few days a week and Rowan loves them. I'm getting a little nervous for winter. Rowan loves being outside more than any kid I've ever met. He would set up a tent out back and live there if I would let him. Maybe he'll love playing in the snow just as much? Thank goodness for indoor pools, children's museums, and play lands. 

Quick update on my sweet 13 month old. Rowan really is soooo sweet. Lately I've started to join in the tackle fest that Sel and Row usually do. The other day Sel tackled me and started tickling me. Rowan got so upset. He came over, pushed Sel out of the way while hollering for MOM! then gave me a huge bear hug. He is so sensitive! I hit my head on my bike hanging in the garage the other day and started crying. (Cause it hurt a whole bunch and my head was bleeding and I really, really hate bleeding). Rowan started crying the same instant I did. He was inconsolable until I stopped crying and then all he wanted to do was give me big open-mouthed kisses. It's almost how twins supposedly feel one another's pain. Rowan feels my pain and distress so well. Those mirror neurons are certainly active in his loving little brain. He's getting smarter by the day. He comprehends so much! He actually obeys most of the time now too. He will patiently stand at the top of the stairs with his hand held above his head and wait until I take it to help him down the stairs. Writing all this makes me want to run upstairs and kiss him all over. He would undoubtedly push me away because it wouldn't be his choice to be kissed by me. 

Bike ride in Idaho Falls

Playing in the water with Aunt Sarah

Graham Canyon ice-cream cone on BYU campus. I missed that place SO  MUCH! Why can't I just always live in Provo and be a student? I couldn't stop wishing for that while we wandered around my alma mater. 

So many grand babies and great-grand babies have ridden in that wagon. I remember dragging my sister around in it and she complaining that I was to heavy to pull. If my teeny tiny grandma can pull Rowan, Sarah should have been able to pull me. Right?

He had his first ice-cream cone on this trip and now he wants nothing else to eat

What do YOU want? This is our turf

He has a crush on her. 

He "helped" me pick raspberries. Aka, he sorted one raspberry to every bin then smashed a bunch in his hand and pleaded with me to wipe off the offensive nectar from the gods. 

Do all kids love water this much? SHould I take him to Sea World and see if they would be open to the idea of a baby exhibit?

Rowan Turns One

My sweet baby is officially a toddler! I thought I would be really nostalgic and weepy, but I've found myself incredibly happy instead. I read over my monthly posts about Row and was so proud of all he has accomplished this last year. He has grown from this precious little 9 lb infant to a sweet, busy, and brilliant 23 lb kiddo. I feel like Rowan has grown at an exceptionally fast pace. He was a fairly big baby who was incredibly aware and interactive, then he kept up his exponential growth those first few months. I feel like I have a 16 month old as opposed to a one-year-old and I honestly wouldn't have it any other way.
I can't even begin to describe how grateful I am for Rowan. The other night I was nursing him before bed and realized everything I've ever hoped for, wanted, and dreamed of fit snuggly on my lap. My whole life, heart and soul embodied in an angelic little human. He defines perfection. 

Let's talk about Rowboat. This month Row has leveled up from being pretty sharp, to full-on genius. He understands so much! He learns at a frightening rate and his memory is razor sharp. I know most one-year-old's have a short attention span, but this kid can focus. This last month he went from knowing a few signs to almost 40. When I started recording the signs he knows last week, there were only 25. He adores being able to communicate with us. It honestly scares me a little how quickly he is learning. I feel a bit unequipped to teach him. I just keep feeling like I am not quite bright enough to keep up with him. I've decided to up my game on educating myself and have given up Netflix in favor of frequent library visits. Waiit, sorry getting sidetracked and talking about Rowan's understudy instead of the true star. 

Here are a list of his current signs: FAN (this is his all-time fav for life sign. Whenever we FaceTime his grandparents, all he does is sign for them to show him their fan. Is there a profession out there as a fan expert? If not, he'll likely invent a Ph.D in Fan Studies),
light, dog, cat, cracker, bean, go, car, outside, milk, drink, banana, leaf, wash hands, potty, tree, sun, bird, ball, crocodile, fish, hat/hot (he gets confused on this one and uses them interchangeably), on, baby, swing, no, socks, shoes, yes, prayer, thank you (this one is adorable! The sign for thank you sort of looks like blowing a kiss so Rowan always blows a kiss when I ask him to say thank you) , slide, grass, rain, open, magic (he just learned this one over the past 24 hours and it's hilarious. Sel started popping some of his birthday balloons with a thumbtack and Rowan was transfixed. I practiced more with him today and he couldn't get enough of it), ball, more, grapes, train, food, feelings (this one I didn't even teach him. He picked it up from baby signing time and started doing it when I was reading him a book that talked about feelings), again, please

Rowan has also started to fold his arms anytime he sits down to eat food. The other day I was at feeding him and he just stopped and expectantly folded his arms for a prayer! I had totally spaced doing one and my ever good little guy reminded me. 

This month Rowan has learned to throw his diapers in the trash! Yeah! He also has learned to throw toys, binkies, whole bananas, and my sister's cell phone in there too. 

I know most think their child is the sweetest thing on the plant, but Rowan truly is. He just LOVES people. He loves giving hugs and kisses to other kids and most kids sort of hate it. It breaks my little mom heart to see how much he wants to just share the love and how often he gets the cold shoulder. He is just so interested in playing with other kids. I've noticed the younger crowd (5 and under) seems very confused by his excitement to play with them. The biggest problem right now is how interested in he is in what another kid is doing. If another child wants to play with a car while Row is playing with a ball, Rowan will decide he wants to play with the car. Once the older child decides to move on to the ball now that Rowan is all over he/she, Rowan decides he wants to play with the ball again. I think he hasn't figured out just yet how to joint play, but he really, really wants to. 

Rowan has always been affectionate, but he hasn't even been overly snuggly. I had resigned myself to being satisfied with his brief hugs and kisses, but now I have a kid who not only submits to my demands for cuddling, but he demands it from me! Now that it is his choice when to come to me instead of being forced by a previous lack of mobility, he actually seems to enjoy snuggling up on my lap. Dad is still his favorite playmate, but he is certainly securely attached to me. When he is tired or hurt, I am his comfort object. 

Row has slowed down on growth.  He still likes food, but pretty much only snacks here and there. The things he does really love right now are grapes, green smoothies, plums, watermelon, noodles, and wheat balls(delish vegan recipie). I was concerned about his slowing, but the doc said it was normal. He only gained one pound since his 9 month (23 lbs) and one inch (30.5) which dropped him to the 75% for both. He only has two little bottom teeth which again is supposedly normal. My final question for the pediatrician became all too easy to ask when Row ran across the room and started banging his head against the wall. The head banging happens at least weekly. Guess he is normal there too. The thing he wasn't normal on was how interactive and bright! The doctor gave him a book with baby faces on it and he started signing baby! She noted his cognitive and retention abilities seem spot on. I am sure she says that to everyone about their kid, but I am chosing to believe she was sincere. Mom pride. 

I have to share one hilarious story that happened today. I was trying to unpack from visiting my parents and heard Rowan go into the bathroom. He has become incredibly interested in "the potty". He keeps throwing things in there and loves to shut the lid anytime it is open. I used my authoritative mom voice to ask what he was doing and started to make my way to the bathroom. All of a sudden, Row runs (actually runs-not just toddles about) out of the bathroom with an absolutely terrified look on his face and adorning this season's most fashionable toilet paper scarf. I bent down to scoop him up, but he arched away from me then belly flopped between my legs. He started scampering away like some wounded forest animal. He obviously knew he had done something I was not going to approve of from the look on his face and petrified running from me. I lifted the toilet lid to find a bunch of pictures I'd printed off for his birthday in there. It could have been worse, but his reaction couldn't have been better. 

Finally, what did we do to celebrate this little dude? My sister flew all the way from Utah to celebrate with us. Now that is an aunt who loves her nephew. She helped me fill the crib with balloons when he  woke up at 5:30am then we watched him play around in his new car from Grams Warden. He went back to bed  then woke up to his G and G King and two great aunties arriving to wish him happy birthday. All of his birthday wishers had to sacrifice a lot to come! His aunties drove seven hours through brutal traffic plus got a hotel room for the night, my parents are in the process of moving and my dad was absolutely exhausted, and my mom was days from having knee surgery.  Rowan immediately decided he would like to open presents when his adoring fans arrived. Holy moly this kid is one loved little guy! He is so blessed with so many people who love him. We then rented some rowboats at a nearby lake. My Rowboat hated it. The life jackets were uncomfortable for him and made it hard To see. He liked the water though so it wasn't a complete parenting fail. We also dined at Row's fav establishment that evening. His Asian BFF And him have such a cute connection. She gave him some tasty treats for free and held him for part of the meal. He was sadly exhausted by cake time. He only ate it to show his gratitude to me for making him a "plant-based" cake until the wee hours of the night on his birthday eve. I got uncharisticstivslly crafty for his big day by making his bow tie, banners, and food decorations. I felt kinda ridiculous, but I blame the King gene for that one.

I am so grateful to be this sweet, loving, beautiful little boy's mom. He is my pride and joy. He's the gift that doesn't stop giving. He's perfect in absolutely everyway imaginable.

Row's new car from his G&G Warden

The ballon crib explosion of 2015

A giant one of his pics. These are the some of the ones he plucked off and stored in the porcelain treasure chest. 

Look at that smiley guy!

I also made his ONEsie. I just ironed on some letters and had him put his painted hands on the back - so extraordinarily  gifted am I. 

Row's fav food 

More of Row's faces

Obviously Row hearts Rowing. 

LIke so much

The three people who ALL miraculously survived the last 365 days 

Daze of Rowan

I don't know if I am just overly nosey or healthily curious, but I am always wondering what is going on in people's day-to-day lives that you don't see or read about. I mean, I mostly know what my parents do everyday and Sel, but I also miss big parts of their life. Especially since Sel is pretty brief in his recount of the day and I am always getting tangled up in telling him way too many details from mine. Well since I am sure evvvveryone is wondering about every tiny detail in my life, here is an incredibly interesting and detailed documentation of a day in the Warden household.

5:45am - I hear Rowan crying on the monitor and will him with my mom psychic powers to go back to sleep. Sel's alarm will be going off in ten minutes and I know there is nothing worse than being woken up a few minutes before your alarm.

5:48 - I sigh and get out of bed. Rowan is jumping up and down in his crib saying Momma! Momma! over and over. I can't help but smile and relish the adoration of my numero uno fan. 

I sit down to nurse him. Mid-nurse he signs that he wants a cracker. I am almost 100% certain he does not actually want a cracker, but thinks that is his ticket to play downstairs instead of going back to bed. 

6:00- We stumble downstairs to eat a breakfast of crackers. Rowan grabs the cracker I hand him, then lunges into the living room. He plays with some toys for a minute while finishing his cracker. He glances over at me and I can tell he knows I am about to take him back upstairs to bed. He furiously signs that he wants to watch Baby Signing Time knowing again how to avoid bed a little bit longer. 

6:10 - I have given up hope of getting quickly back to bed and decide to make Sel breakfast like the bomb awesome wife that I am. I pour him a bowl of cereal and cut up some bananas and strawberries to put on top. I put a carton of cashew milk next to it and admire what an fantastic cook I am. Thank goodness Sel has a part-time chef, full-time model for a wife. 

6:15 I go back into the living room and Rowan wants to sit in my lap while we watch the rest of Baby Signing Time. He lounges comfortably there and pats my arm. He then reaches up to pull my head down to rest on his head. I happily submit to the morning cuddling demands. 

6:45 Sel leaves for the hospital to show off his Internal Medicine skills and I take the sleepy boy in my arms back up to his crib. He lays down happily in his crib which never fails to amaze me these days. I debate whether to run on the treadmill or go back to bed. The idea of putting on a sports bra tires me out and I decide bed it is. 

8:45 I wake up feeling like a Disney princess. I excitedly realize I can brush my teeth and go to the bathroom without Rowan wanting to assist me in my morning routine! Right as I reach for my toothbrush, I hear him yell MOM from his room. Thank goodness I didn't have high aspirations of a shower on my dream list. I go in his room and he throws a binky at me. I let him nurse again, but he rolls off my lap and takes off for the door. His favorite thing to do lately is watch the blood drain out of my face as he tries to walk down our stairs. I grab him and pin him down to take of his PJ's and diaper. Once both are off, he wrestles free and runs to the door. He starts banging on it as if I am a monster in a horror film about to eat him. I take him downstairs naked hoping he will be more compliant down there. He isn't. He zooms around naked throwing our assortment of balls. I pin him down again while he whines and wriggles hysterically. Once he has a diaper and clothes on, he signs that he wants to go outside. It rained last night so there are hundreds of puddles for Rowan to jump in. We splash around in them until Rowan tries to drink the water like the African baby from Babies. 

9:15 We go back inside. Rowan is now soaked and needs a new outfit. He signs that he wants to wash his hands. He sits on his perch in the sink playing with the soap while I scrub his hands and feet. 

9:30 I notice I have a voicemail. It's from an angel woman at Sam's who found Sel's wallet in a puddle. I look at the newly dressed baby who is most assuredly the wallet dropping culprit. I have to make a few phone calls regarding girls camp, but Rowan keeps signing that he wants me to swing him in the infant carseat. I momentarily regret teaching him sign language. I try to write on a sticky pad all the things the director is telling me while simultaneously swinging Rowan around. 

10:00 We head to Sam's club to retrieve the wallet. I let Rowan run rampant down all the aisles. I remember we are out of sugar and grab a 10 lb bag. Row is insistent that I let him hold it. He grunts while he tries to lift essentially half his body weight. An elderly man with a cowboy hat stops to watch Row. As soon as he realizes he has an audience, Rowan scrunches one shoulder up to his cheek and smiles. He then doubles his efforts to pick up the sugar. As soon a the man walks away, Rowan beelines it for a toddler walking behind her mom. Rowan walks excitedly up to the girl and wraps his arms around her while the toddler exclaims that there is "A BABY!". 

11:00 We head home after an hour of cruising around Sam's. We play ball for a little bit when we get home. Rowan signs food-which means watermelon in this household. I try to get him to sit in his seat, but he won't bend his legs. I take the tray off his highchair to better get him in there. He throws an epic tantrum. I have a genius moment and lower the highchair to the level of our table. Rowan relaxes and sits happily at the table. Once he has apparently reached a level of satiety, he begins throwing his food on the floor. I tell him no and he makes what I am guessing is an imitation of my serious face and shakes his head back and forth. I give him a small piece of banana which he immediately throws on the floor. I sternly say no and tell him he doesn't get anymore food. He erupts in tears. Time for a nap.

11:45 - Rowan goes down easy. I debate whether to do something productive like the dishes, exercise, fold laundry or to sit on the couch eating ginger carrot soup leftover and reading my book. I compromise with myself to do the dishes then read while walking on the treadmill.

12:45 - I hope off of the treadmill and swear I am going to go upstairs and shower in just one second. I just need to check my email.

1:15 - Somehow 30 minutes have vanished from my life while looking at my dumb phone. Rowan is babbling happily over the monitor. Looks like I will be trying to shower with an extremely mobile baby. Rowan and I get in the shower and I try to figure out how to block him from getting my shampoo in his eyes. Bubbles from my shampoo pile up by the drain that Rowan is sitting on. He eats a giant handful while I try to stop him. I rinse his hands and hand him a toy. He dips his face in the water and eats another bunch of bubbles. I give up and let him have at it. Bubbles for lunch.

1:30 - Rowan helps me brush my hair (whacks me in the head with the brush). I throw on some clothes then hold up two options of clothes for Rowan to pick from. He laughs and grabs them both then throws them away from him. Nudity is his preferred outfit. He signs that he wants to go outside. I slap a diaper on him and we head out to jump in more puddles.

3:00 - We somehow manage to spend 90 minutes happily playing in puddles and our miniature baby playground. While playing in puddles, a lady shoots me a dirty look when Rowan rips off his diaper and sits on the sidewalk naked. I contemplate taking off my pants knowing she is obviously disapproving of the fact that I am not also naked. Instead, I wave and she scowls back while mumbling something under her breath. Parenting for the win over here.

3:00 Rowan is on outfit two of the day now. I feel kind of sick and then remember I squandered my time to eat lunch. We go into the kitchen where Rowan keeps signing cracker while holding a cracker in each hand. Row and I share a bowl of carrot soup. He tries to steal my spoon and then drop it on the floor. I curse our landlord for putting in disgusting carpet in a kitchen. But seriously, what were you thinking?!

3:20 - I realize I need to find some manuals for girls camp. We head to the church to pick them up. As soon as we walk in, Rowan smells a basketball. He honestly doesn't even go in the gym that much when we are at church, but he knows exactly where the basketballs are kept. He squishes his face against the glass and says "ba! ba!" over and over until I relent. We go in the gym and pass the basketball back and forth. He then decides he wants to shoot. For the first time in his impressive basketball career, he bends his knees and bounces while shooting. It's so adorable I can hardly handle it. He zooms up and down the court dropping the ball then chasing it. I wonder what my life will be like attending hundreds of little league basketball games. I lift him up to grab the net and we do it over and over until I feel like my guns have been sufficiently polished. I lay on the gym floor and Rowan dog piles me. He honks my nose a few times then tries to poke my belly button.

4:20 - I decide I really ought to get the manuals we came here for. Rowan cries when I try to take him out of the gym. I take a brief survey of safety hazards and decide the numbers look pretty good for me to run to the Young Women's room while letting him play in the gym. I barely make it out the door when he cries and calls after me. We go to the cabinet together and start rifling through it. While I am occupied with finding manuals, I hear Rowan playing with a new trashbag liner. I continue to do my thing. A few moments pass without the bag making rustling noises. I turn around to see Rowan licking a piece of chewed up gum. Horrified, I rip it out of his hand and we book it for the bathroom. He happily lets me splash water in his mouth and hands.

5:00 - We have now been at the church for 90 minutes when my plan was maybe 9 minutes. Sel calls to let us know he got off early! Yippee! Nothing like having a husband who comes home before 11:00pm! Sel shows up to the church looking studly in his required button up and tie. I happily applaud whomever thought doctors ought to dress nicely while dealing with vomit, blood, and urine. At least I am winning here. Rowan seems exhausted after b-ball jr practice so we head home.

5:30 - Rowan is down for a nap and I start chopping veggies for dinner. Tonight's special is Dirty Mike's Casserole - a throwback to our young married college days together. Broccoli, spinach, onions, peppers, noodles, a box of red roasted pepper soup, and a sprinkle of nutritional yeast. I pop it in the over and walk into the living room to discover Sel is also taking a brief nap on the couch. I sit down to read my book for a bit.

6:30 - Rowan wakes up just as the casserole is done. Perfect timing little one. All three of us sit down for dinner which still sort of feels like a miracle post-step studying. I savor the moment of my little family happily eating together. We say a prayer and dig in.

6:45 - Rowan does pretty awesome eating some of the casserole. Much better than he has done lately with baby food. He signs for a cracker again. We discover due to Rowan's culinary genius that the casserole tastes mega good with crushed up crackers on top. Thanks dude. Rowan then starts throwing food on the floor and reaching for me. He sits on my lap while I spoon the last few bites in my mouth.

7:00 - Sel heads to the living room to study and Row and I head out for a walk. We see four dogs on our walk. Rowan's favorite sign of all time (other than cracker) is dog. He excitedly pets all of them and slaps his leg over and over. We almost make it back to our house before he causes internal bleeding from straining to get out. I pull him out and let him walk. Instead of walking forward, he heads toward a pile of sticks. We play with the sticks for a bit. He spots a pile of dog poop and heads toward that charming brown tower. I grab him and try to start walking back to our house while pushing the stroller and carrying my wriggling baby. I fail. We stop again a few feet away and play with the leaves and grass. I pull out my big guns and tempt Rowan back into the stroller with a binky I was hiding in my pocket.

8:15 - We arrive home and Sel is concluding his last case study. I take Rowan upstairs for bath time. I can't figure out why there are so many bubbles while the water is running. I reach for his baby wash only to realize Rowan has somehow poured the entire container into the bath. My potential annoyance is dashed away by how happy he is playing in the bubbles. This is essentially his first bubble bath. Once he switches from eating handfuls of bubbles to drinking cups of it, I cut him off.

8:45 - We play our new game of passing mom the binky while I try to get him in his diaper and pjs without a full on meltdown. He giggles and I realize I somehow birthed the most incredible, adorable and sweetest baby to ever live. We say prayers. Our at least I do while Rowan tries to pull my shirt down over and over. He feverishly signs milk while I peek at him through my closed eyes. He nurses and slips happily into his crib.

9:15 - I come downstairs and offer to make Sel a watermelon slushy (frozen watermelon, lime, and coconut milk - totally life changer) hoping it will impress the pants off of him. It takes way longer than I expect because the watermelon chunks are really frozen.

9:40 Finally, we start our "companionship study" of Preach My Gospel. My new favorite part of our time together - which has been pretty sparse lately.

10:00 - Sel says he is going to play one game of League of Legends. I go to do the dishes and watch Dr. Who while cleaning up the kitchen. Once done, I decide to get a start on our cow costumes for Chick-Fil-A free meal day. I watch an interview on the Glen Beck Show of Stephanie Nielson (author of Heaven is Here). I try to get over how much I dislike him and focus on how much I like her.

11:00 Sel says he is heading up to bed. I say I am going to fold laundry then be right up. I look at the three piles of laundry waiting to be folded and vow to do it tomorrow. While getting ready for bed, I notice Sel has sweetly taken my glasses from my bedside table and put them in the bathroom for me. I stumble around our room anyway trying to plug in my phone and Rowan's monitor. After I am positive I have disrupted Sel to the max, I crawl into bed. He grabs my hand when I get under the covers and I let sleep wash over me.

I know. I know that was probably incredibly boring to read. It certainly wasn't boring to live it though. Luckiest girl in the world right here.