So in my head I was going to try and condense all that happened in August into one post. And then my head hurt. And then I remembered my dream to be mysterious (which has never ever happened in my entire life). I may write about how August was the best month there ever has or ever will be or I may not. Now onto the subject I will undoubtedly fail this semester-
Domestication.
Ha. I know. Me and Domestic don't really belong in the same sentence. The thing is I happen to be married (to the best man in the universe I might add) and there is some unwritten rule that you have to be more domestic when you are married. Here is my report card of domestic skills I had before I got married:
Sewing: N (Nonexistent)
Cooking: D (Dangerous)
Laundry: S (Satisfactory)
Cleaning/Organization: N+ (Mostly nonexistent)
Time Management: L (Laughable)
I would show you my married domestic report card, but then you would be as horrified as I would. You might even become so depressed by my failures that you would justify eating the Lindt truffles from Grandma & Grandpa Warden that maybe your husband and you decided to only eat on Sundays. And then maybe you would feel bad about having a lack of self control and justify eating another Lindt truffle. And then you would need to disguise your downfall by wrapping up tin foil in little truffle sized balls and putting them in the now empty spaces where decadent chocolate used to be. Whoops...
The first load of laundry I did as a married woman was a bit disastrous. Sel drives the batmobile. (not exactly, but it is really cool). Sel's car comes with this nifty key that you can keep in your pocket at all times. You just stand next to the car, it senses the key in your pocket with it's bat radar, and then unlocks the door for you with a laser. Same thing for locking the car. You start the car by pushing a big button (my favorite part) and your key gets to kick back in your warm pocket the whole time (though you do have to feed it flies from time to time). Sel's key happens to also cost $600 or so. It also happened to get the blessed chance to swim in a washing machine for 45 minutes because I forgot to check his pockets. My artistic tin foiling wasn't going to fool Sel in this instance. Luckily, because the bat key has super powers, it is still in working order.
Organization/Cleaning has also dropped a grade level or two because the Bungalow (our apartment) currently resembles the aftermath of multiple natural disasters: an F5 tornado followed shortly by a 10.0 Earthquake and topped off with a massive spider invasion. The reason our suitcases are still unpacked is because we are just making sure we are prepared should another disaster hit...
Cooking: :) So Sel made me breakfast our first day of school. He made sesame seed and swiss toaster things with freshly sliced tomatoes and cucumbers on top and sliced up some tasty fruit for us. Guess what I made for breakfast the day before that? Reese's Puff's with skim milk. Sel always sets the curve WAY too high for someone with my cooking background. We have made some pretty delicious dinners together this week solely because he is some sort of gourmet chef and he has mastered the art of L supervision.
Time management hasn't really worsened. It has mostly just remained impressively low on the grading scale. Sel helps with this though. We have woken up every morning this week to exercise, read our scriptures, and eat a nutritious breakfast (as long as I am not in charge of making it). Yesterday, however, I went home to "do homework" while Sel was in class. This is what happened-I decided to eat our pizza leftovers while I read my Nutrition book. The first sentence in my nutrition book talked about how pizza was unhealthy. The nutrition book had to go away until I decided it was forgiven for chiding me on my food choices. I then decided to find my TA books which were (of course) in the bottom most box in the second bedroom. I decided I needed to unpack some boxes so I could actually get my books out. I found my old journal and two hours latter got a text from Kit. Homework accomplished without Sel: 2 pages read in my nutrition book.
Here is my marriage advice to the world: Marry someone just like Sel because he is the most patient, loving, sweet, forgiving, patient, perfect man in the universe. Also, if you see Sel you should give him a hug so he doesn't feel so sad that is wife is the least domestic person in the universe.
Domestication.
Ha. I know. Me and Domestic don't really belong in the same sentence. The thing is I happen to be married (to the best man in the universe I might add) and there is some unwritten rule that you have to be more domestic when you are married. Here is my report card of domestic skills I had before I got married:
Sewing: N (Nonexistent)
Cooking: D (Dangerous)
Laundry: S (Satisfactory)
Cleaning/Organization: N+ (Mostly nonexistent)
Time Management: L (Laughable)
I would show you my married domestic report card, but then you would be as horrified as I would. You might even become so depressed by my failures that you would justify eating the Lindt truffles from Grandma & Grandpa Warden that maybe your husband and you decided to only eat on Sundays. And then maybe you would feel bad about having a lack of self control and justify eating another Lindt truffle. And then you would need to disguise your downfall by wrapping up tin foil in little truffle sized balls and putting them in the now empty spaces where decadent chocolate used to be. Whoops...
The first load of laundry I did as a married woman was a bit disastrous. Sel drives the batmobile. (not exactly, but it is really cool). Sel's car comes with this nifty key that you can keep in your pocket at all times. You just stand next to the car, it senses the key in your pocket with it's bat radar, and then unlocks the door for you with a laser. Same thing for locking the car. You start the car by pushing a big button (my favorite part) and your key gets to kick back in your warm pocket the whole time (though you do have to feed it flies from time to time). Sel's key happens to also cost $600 or so. It also happened to get the blessed chance to swim in a washing machine for 45 minutes because I forgot to check his pockets. My artistic tin foiling wasn't going to fool Sel in this instance. Luckily, because the bat key has super powers, it is still in working order.
Organization/Cleaning has also dropped a grade level or two because the Bungalow (our apartment) currently resembles the aftermath of multiple natural disasters: an F5 tornado followed shortly by a 10.0 Earthquake and topped off with a massive spider invasion. The reason our suitcases are still unpacked is because we are just making sure we are prepared should another disaster hit...
Cooking: :) So Sel made me breakfast our first day of school. He made sesame seed and swiss toaster things with freshly sliced tomatoes and cucumbers on top and sliced up some tasty fruit for us. Guess what I made for breakfast the day before that? Reese's Puff's with skim milk. Sel always sets the curve WAY too high for someone with my cooking background. We have made some pretty delicious dinners together this week solely because he is some sort of gourmet chef and he has mastered the art of L supervision.
Time management hasn't really worsened. It has mostly just remained impressively low on the grading scale. Sel helps with this though. We have woken up every morning this week to exercise, read our scriptures, and eat a nutritious breakfast (as long as I am not in charge of making it). Yesterday, however, I went home to "do homework" while Sel was in class. This is what happened-I decided to eat our pizza leftovers while I read my Nutrition book. The first sentence in my nutrition book talked about how pizza was unhealthy. The nutrition book had to go away until I decided it was forgiven for chiding me on my food choices. I then decided to find my TA books which were (of course) in the bottom most box in the second bedroom. I decided I needed to unpack some boxes so I could actually get my books out. I found my old journal and two hours latter got a text from Kit. Homework accomplished without Sel: 2 pages read in my nutrition book.
Here is my marriage advice to the world: Marry someone just like Sel because he is the most patient, loving, sweet, forgiving, patient, perfect man in the universe. Also, if you see Sel you should give him a hug so he doesn't feel so sad that is wife is the least domestic person in the universe.
Sweety, you are awesome and I think i just may be less domestic than you. It'll be fine. Also, NEVER your fault that HE left the key in the pocket. He should know better! He did marry you! Love you girl!
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